Sometimes there are glimpses in this body-mind, that the I that experiences what we would call life is not the real watcher of this reality. In a way it is like there is something seeing that Jacob is now talking, saying things that just seems to appear from nowhere and that the I or Jacob after would have no memory about. It’s like what is being said is impersonal and not really something that Jacob has thought about. In that sense it is very much the same as the person Jacob is trying to do with this blog, just allowing whatever appears in writing to appear. But in that sense it is still somehow one who is trying or seeking the right answers, even do Jacob intellectually knows there is no answer to seek for.
There is a sense of I that is not really allowed here, and way the body-mind trying to escape the inescapable death. The mental understanding that the I does not exist, makes it even stronger, because it sets the I up to be something real to get reed of. So in a way the seeker (the I), is pushing that which it is seeking for in front of it self. Like a dog dog trying to catch it’s on tale. By constantly pushing the I in front of me, it is in reality the I trying to catch the I, which of course is not possible. It is a very brilliant way of doing it, so that somehow the I will still be pleased by doing something, or believing it is doing something 
And it will never end, this is like the endless road just going on and on forever.
Unless of course somehow this body-mind will be aware of from where this is noticed. What is it that is aware of this dance between the two separated parts of I that is constantly trying to catch each other? What is it that is aware of this separation? What is aware of this beautiful dance of life, that is going on every now, in this endless stream of life? What is aware of the me having body sensations? What is aware of the me having a cold? What is aware of the me having a thought about something? Is this awareness, what we call the I AM, and if so who dares to rest into this?
Maybe there is no answers to this, maybe there are millions, maybe the answer is exactly what is, because it can be nothing else. But there is in this body-mind a willingness to investigate this, not by thinking, but by being this very awareness, or seeing that this is what is and nothing else is for real…
Love Jacob
